Therapies
Terminology
NLP is probably one of the most valuable skills we can familiarise ourselves with. The term Neuro Linguistic Programming might alarm even the bravest of us but it need not faze any of you.
NLP is the study of human excellence and translates as:
Neuro- our thinking process and neurology
Linguistic- the language we use and how we are influenced by it
Programming- our behavioural patterns
NLP is easily described as software for the brain.
When we are born and while growing up we are constantly loading software onto our hard drives. We believe what people tell us and we make decisions based on what we have learned. And then we get older. The software we are still running from childhood becomes outdated and we need an upgrade that will allow us to live at our true potential.
NLP is the upgrade.
It was developed in the 1970’s by Richard Bandler, an information scientist, and John Grindler, a linguistics professor.
Their aim was to study very successful therapists and discover what made them so good at what they do. They concept was simple.
It was called “modelling” and meant that if you wanted to achieve something in your life, you should go and find someone who is already living the life you desire, find out what they were doing, how they were doing it, how they were communicating verbally and non-verbally and simply apply the same principles to your own life in order to get the same results.
There is no need to reinvent the wheel every time you need a mode of transportation.
The wonderful thing is this: NLP is simple and incredibly effective (I have used it to quit smoking, release a spider and snake phobia and do a 27’ fire walk!) AND can mostly be used anywhere and at any time without having to be in an altered state.
NLP helps us to identify and utilise patterns that our bodies and brains run. If these patterns are not serving us we can “tweak” them in order to benefit us. By doing this we can raise our levels of performance and achieve things we never thought possible.
Language determines how we influence and communicate with ourselves and others. Negative language results in poor results being achieved whilst empowering language generates empowered performance. Are you aware that 93% of communication is non verbal?
NLP is also being used in marketing, advertising, sport and education. Effective learning strategies are also being incorporated by identifying children’s preferred representational system.
We use our senses outwardly to perceive the world, and inwardly to “re-present” experience to ourselves. In NLP the ways we take in, store and code information in out minds are known as representational systems.
There are 5 representational systems:
|
• Audio • Visual • Kinaesthetic • Olfactory • Gustatory |
sight hearing touch/ feeling smell taste |
We use all of our senses externally all the time, although we will pay attention to one sense more than another depending on what we are doing. Surprisingly, when we think we tend to favour one representational systems regardless of what we are thinking about.
A composer will prefer his auditory system whilst an illustrator cannot do his job without his visual system.
This is why sometimes it feels like you are speaking another language to the person you are talking to. They might favour their auditory system and are paying close attention to what you are saying whilst you are drawing away on a flip chart (visual) and not focusing on what you are saying as much as you are on the drawings and the different representational systems make it hard for you to be compatible.
The mind is incredibly powerful and NLP does not underestimate this power. It works hand in hand with it and allows us to function at a higher efficiency rate than before.
The techniques are simple to use but I do advise anyone without the proper training to seek a qualified therapist if the issue at hand is overwhelming.
This is a very condensed description of NLP and I strongly recommend further reading on the topic. There are various courses being offered and lots of websites to browse.
Here is a really good course to get you started Recommended reading:
Introducing NLP by Joseph O’Connor and John Seymour
http://tinyurl.com/g7jss
NLP KEY PRINCIPLES
• The map is not the territory
Everything we know we know because we remember it. The “map” is our memories and the “territory” is reality. Our memories are not always accurate. We need to remember that our memories are not the reality. It is just that- our memories OF the reality.• Experience has a structure
Everything we know, we know because we have stored and remembered it. Every memory has a structure. Some memories are worse than others. Why is that? Because of the structure of the memory. Change the structure and you change the memory and also the emotions connected with it.• People already possess all the resources they need for peak performance
The necessary software in our minds is just outdated. Update the software and you will be functioning at your peak.• Anyone can do anything
Unless restricted by nature.• It is impossible to not communicate
97% of communicating is non verbal. How you say it and what you look like when saying it carries more weight than the actual words.• The meaning of your communication is the response you get
• Underlying every behaviour is a positive intention
We are all basically good. We make decisions out of love or fear.
• The person with the most flexibility in a system will have the most influence
• There is no failure- Only feedback for the next step
Accessing cues |
The way we tune our bodies by breathing, posture, gesture and eye movements to think in certain ways |
Anchoring |
The process by which any stimulus gets connected to and triggers a response or state. Anchors can occur naturally or be set up intentionally. |
Associated |
Inside an experience, seeing through your own eyes, fully in your senses. |
Beliefs |
The generalizations we make about the world and our operating principles in it. |
Calibration |
Accurately reading another person’s state by reading non-verbal signals |
Congruence |
State of being unified, and completely sincere, with all aspects of a person working toward an outcome |
Disassociated |
Not in an experience, seeing or hearing it from outside your body |
Distortion |
Process by which something is inaccurately represented internally |
Elicitation |
Evoking a state by your behaviour |
Generalization |
Process by which one specific experience come to represent a whole class of experiences |
Identity |
Your self image or concept. The totality of your being |
Incongruence |
State of having reservations. Not totally committed to an outcome |
Internal representations |
Patterns of information we create and store in our minds in combinations of images, sounds, feelings, smells and tastes |
Leading |
Changing your own behaviour with enough rapport for the other person to follow |
Map of reality |
Each person’s unique representation of the world built from his or her individual perceptions and experiences |
Matching |
Adopting parts of another person’s behaviour for the purpose of enhancing rapport |
Mirroring |
Precisely matching portions of another person’s behaviour |
Modelling |
Process of discerning patterns and behaviour that enable someone to accomplish a task |
Pacing |
Gaining and maintaining rapport with another person by joining them in their model of the world. Pacing goes over into leading. You pace them and then you lead them. |
Rapport |
Process of establishing and maintaining a relationship of mutual trust and understanding |
Resourceful state |
The neurological and physical experience when a person feels resourceful |
State |
How you feel, your mood. The sum total of all neurological and physical processes within an individual at any moment in time. Our state affects our interpretation and capability of all situations. |
Stimuli |
Something external that elicits or influences a physiological or psychological activity or response |
Timeline |
The way we store pictures, sounds and feelings of our past, present and future. |
Trance |
An altered state where the person’s focus is directed on a few stimuli |
Unconscious |
Anything that is not in your present moment awareness |